Do You Ever Get Mad Tanya? Joy and Leadership from a 12 Year Old.

I’m a StepMom.  Or S’Mom as my girls call me and in the almost six years we have been a family they have both taught me and challenged me, in very good ways.  Piper is our 12 year old and she just spent about 10 days with us and is now off to camp.  After a somewhat challenging outing where she displayed what I call a ‘fun-sucking’ attitude she asked me, “do you ever get mad Tanya?”  My husband nearly spit up on himself and I laughed out loud.  And of course I get mad, although I don’t get really mad that often anymore.  I get ticked off or irritated but not too often will you see me lose my temper, and if I do its usually because I’ve let things pile up or haven’t taken great care of myself which lands in the pool of little patience with a deep end of self pity.
What she doesn’t know is that I have spent a lot of my life mad.  And it took some personal work to break that all down and use that fuel for good.  But here is what’s really interesting, she wasn’t being disrespectful, she believes I’m always happy.  Wow, what a great thing for a kid to perceive about their parent?  I have spent considerable time thinking about this over the last few days.  I even double checked that perception with my 14 year old niece who confirmed, ‘yes Auntie’, smiling knowingly, ‘you always seem happy.’ 
Now, of course, we need to temper that with what anyone remembers about any person or anything, but the truth must be that to these young beings I seem pretty joyful pretty much all the time.  What an achievement!
The rest of the truth is that I’m not happy or joyful all the time, but I am joyful a lot, more than I have been in a long while. Part of that is the leap I took 368 days ago when I quit my federal pensioned job to work on things and with people I felt passionate about – 371 days ago I wrote my first blog.  It has been a whirlwind year, it has been full of awesome.
By December I was no longer having ‘what have I done’ moments or days and by last Friday I had encountered more skill testing questions in one year than I had in the previous five.  So, yes Piper sees me as happy, a lot.  And I am happy, a lot.  I’m happy because I’m being used and I’m being challenged and I am free.  I work best with autonomy and freedom, working in a government position doesn’t afford you much of either for lots of good reasons.  So what a gift Miss Piper gave me, again.  What an absolute compliment.  Which ironically, brought me more joy.
If we take this example and apply it to the workplace; what would happen if people perceived you as never getting mad?  Would they think you were soft?  A push over?  Not smart?  To qualify this, not giddy or silly, just happy, calm, peaceful, content and pleased with all the things that surround you.  What’s the possibility that they want to know a bit more about this so called happiness, so they could understand it and maybe get some of their own?  Could it be contagious?  Imagine the impact of contented, peaceful, happy people in the workplace?  Would it positively affect your productivity?  Would it reduce your sick time?  Would it increase camaraderie and team work? 

Being a leader who doesn’t get mad often may just give you the emotional space to be contagious. It’s not really about being happy all the time, its about being satisfied and fulfilled with where you are, what you are doing, how you are doing it and who you are portraying to those around you.  As Joyce Meyer says “are you preaching better than you’re acting?”      

What I also told Piper is that I’ve learned that happiness, like anger, is a choice.  I can be mad, I can hate, I can carry it around with me or I can get over it and find my next pocket of happy.  From my experience, it’s a heavy load, and as I get older, lighter loads are always better. 
  • Under-21 2006 - History - France-Switzerland Lineups
    Posted at 18:19h, 20 November

    CRAIG HOPE AT AMEX STADIUM: It was the sort of moment upon which seasons can hinge. Indeed, if defined flukey. It was delivered and cleared. Danger gone, you presumed. Wrong Brighton 1-2 Newcastle: Ayoze Perez slots late winner as Rafa Benitez’s side complete dramatic comeback against promotion rivals

  • gamefly
    Posted at 19:22h, 02 May

    Hello friends, pleasant article and nice urging commented here, I am genuinely enjoying by these.

  • gamefly
    Posted at 04:07h, 03 May

    Hi there, I discovered your blog via Google while searching for a similar matter, your web site got here up, it looks
    good. I’ve bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.
    Hello there, simply become alert to your blog via Google,
    and located that it is really informative. I’m gonna
    watch out for brussels. I will be grateful if you happen to proceed this
    in future. Many folks shall be benefited out of your writing.


  • gamefly
    Posted at 12:32h, 03 May

    Hi there very cool website!! Guy .. Excellent ..
    Superb .. I’ll bookmark your blog and take the feeds also?
    I am happy to find so many useful information here within the post, we want develop more techniques on this regard,
    thank you for sharing. . . . . .

  • gamefly
    Posted at 23:48h, 03 May

    Good post. I learn something new and challenging on sites I stumbleupon everyday.

    It’s always exciting to read through content from other authors and practice a little
    something from their sites.

  • gamefly
    Posted at 19:07h, 04 May

    Pretty! This was an incredibly wonderful post. Thank you for supplying this info.

  • minecraft free
    Posted at 22:50h, 06 May

    Hi there, just wanted to say, I loved this post.
    It was helpful. Keep on posting!

  • minecraft download
    Posted at 20:19h, 08 May

    The other day, while I was at work, my cousin stole my iPad and tested to see if
    it can survive a 25 foot drop, just so she
    can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now destroyed and she has 83
    views. I know this is completely off topic
    but I had to share it with someone!

  • minecraft download mojang
    Posted at 07:02h, 09 May

    I’m amazed, I have to admit. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s equally educative and interesting, and let me tell you,
    you’ve hit the nail on the head. The problem
    is something which too few men and women are speaking intelligently
    about. I’m very happy I stumbled across this during my hunt for something concerning this.

  • free minecraft download
    Posted at 22:05h, 09 May

    Hi there, its fastidious paragraph regarding media print, we
    all be aware of media is a fantastic source of data.

  • download minecraft free
    Posted at 00:54h, 10 May

    Have you ever thought about writing an e-book or guest authoring on other sites?
    I have a blog centered on the same ideas you
    discuss and would love to have you share some stories/information.
    I know my visitors would appreciate your work. If you are even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e mail.

  • g
    Posted at 00:25h, 11 May

    It’s very easy to find out any matter on net as compared to textbooks, as I found this post at this web site.

  • g
    Posted at 00:18h, 12 May

    I do not even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was great.
    I don’t know who you are but certainly you are going
    to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!

  • g
    Posted at 02:49h, 12 May

    Very soon this web site will be famous among all blog visitors, due to it’s pleasant content

  • download minecraft
    Posted at 05:18h, 12 May

    With havin so much content do you ever run into any
    problems of plagorism or copyright infringement? My website has a lot of completely unique content I’ve either written myself or outsourced but it looks like a lot of it is popping it up all over the
    internet without my agreement. Do you know any techniques to help stop content from being stolen? I’d genuinely appreciate it.

  • minecraft download free
    Posted at 17:37h, 12 May

    If some one desires to be updated with most up-to-date technologies then he must be go to see this web page and be up to date everyday.

  • g
    Posted at 05:46h, 13 May

    It is perfect time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy.
    I’ve read this post and if I could I desire to suggest you some interesting things or tips.

    Maybe you can write next articles referring to this article.
    I wish to read even more things about it!

  • g
    Posted at 06:42h, 13 May

    Hey there! Someone in my Facebook group shared this site with us so I came
    to look it over. I’m definitely enjoying the information. I’m bookmarking and will be tweeting this to my followers!
    Wonderful blog and fantastic design and style.

  • g
    Posted at 04:40h, 14 May

    This is very interesting, You’re a very skilled blogger.
    I have joined your rss feed and look forward to seeking more of your fantastic post.
    Also, I’ve shared your site in my social networks!

  • minecraft pc download
    Posted at 10:13h, 14 May

    bookmarked!!, I like your site!

  • how to download minecraft free
    Posted at 17:54h, 15 May

    Definitely believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason seemed to be on the web the easiest thing to be aware of.
    I say to you, I definitely get annoyed while people think about worries that they just don’t know about.
    You managed to hit the nail upon the top as well as defined out the
    whole thing without having side effect , people could
    take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks

  • engine jobs
    Posted at 20:28h, 19 May

    Some genuinely fantastic information, Sword lily I detected this. “Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.” by Henry David Thoreau.

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 10:25h, 29 May

    Thanks to my father who told me concerning this website, this
    weblog is truly remarkable.

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 02:38h, 30 May

    Howdy would you mind letting me know which webhost you’re utilizing?
    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different browsers and I must
    say this blog loads a lot quicker then most. Can you suggest a good web hosting provider at a fair price?
    Cheers, I appreciate it!

  • Tottenham Hotspurs fc tröja
    Posted at 16:28h, 31 May

    Fantastic goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to
    and you are just extremely fantastic. I really like what you have
    acquired here, really like what you’re stating and the
    way in which you say it. You make it entertaining and you still
    care for to keep it sensible. I can not wait to read far more from you.
    This is really a tremendous site. Tottenham Hotspurs fc tröja

  • Billige roma drakt
    Posted at 02:14h, 01 June

    Howdy! Quick question that’s completely off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly?
    My blog looks weird when browsing from my apple iphone.
    I’m trying to find a theme or plugin that might be able to correct this issue.
    If you have any suggestions, please share. With thanks!
    Billige roma drakt

  • gamefly free trial
    Posted at 04:30h, 02 June

    Thank you a lot for sharing this with all people you really
    realize what you’re talking about! Bookmarked. Please additionally visit my site =).
    We can have a link alternate arrangement between us

  • gamefly free trial
    Posted at 12:58h, 03 June

    It’s really a nice and helpful piece of information. I
    am satisfied that you just shared this useful info with us.
    Please keep us up to date like this. Thank you for

  • gamefly free trial
    Posted at 12:10h, 04 June

    Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the
    video to make your point. You obviously know what youre talking about, why throw
    away your intelligence on just posting videos to your site when you could be giving us something enlightening to read?

  • gamefly free trial
    Posted at 17:29h, 05 June

    What’s Happening i’m new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve discovered It positively
    helpful and it has aided me out loads. I hope to give
    a contribution & aid other customers like its helped me.
    Great job.

  • gamefly free trial
    Posted at 02:59h, 07 June

    Hiya! I know this is kinda off topic nevertheless I’d figured I’d ask.
    Would you be interested in exchanging links or maybe guest writing a blog post or vice-versa?
    My website discusses a lot of the same subjects as yours and I feel we could greatly
    benefit from each other. If you’re interested feel free to shoot me an email.
    I look forward to hearing from you! Terrific blog by
    the way!

  • ps4 games list 2019
    Posted at 16:05h, 07 June

    I’ve been surfing online more than 2 hours today, yet I never found any interesting article like yours.
    It’s pretty worth enough for me. In my opinion, if all website
    owners and bloggers made good content as you did,
    the net will be much more useful than ever before.

  • playstation 4 best games ever made 2019
    Posted at 08:53h, 12 June

    Hi, i think that i noticed you visited my blog so i came to go back the prefer?.I am attempting to in finding things to improve my web
    site!I assume its adequate to use some of your ideas!!

  • playstation 4 best games ever made 2019
    Posted at 10:10h, 12 June

    Hi there to every one, the contents existing at this website
    are truly amazing for people knowledge, well, keep up
    the good work fellows.

  • ps4 best games ever made 2019
    Posted at 14:05h, 12 June

    Hi there everybody, here every person is sharing these familiarity, therefore it’s nice
    to read this webpage, and I used to pay a quick visit this weblog
    every day.

  • click resources
    Posted at 04:56h, 13 June

    I just want to mention I’m very new to blogging and absolutely enjoyed this blog. Probably I’m want to bookmark your site . You really have great well written articles. Many thanks for revealing your blog.

  • quest bars cheap
    Posted at 15:59h, 14 June

    Simply desire to say your article is as astounding. The clearness in your post is
    simply great and i can assume you are an expert on this subject.
    Well with your permission let me to grab your RSS feed to
    keep up to date with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please keep up the rewarding

  • quest bars
    Posted at 17:58h, 16 June

    Woah! I’m really enjoying the template/theme of this site.

    It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s difficult to get that
    “perfect balance” between usability and visual appearance.
    I must say you’ve done a amazing job with this.

    In addition, the blog loads very fast for me on Opera. Superb Blog!

  • Blythe Wanat
    Posted at 05:00h, 17 June

    It’s rare knowledgeable individuals on this topic, however, you be understood as guess what happens you are speaking about! Thanks

  • John Deere Diagnostic and Test Manuals
    Posted at 11:12h, 17 June

    Aw, i thought this was an exceptionally good post. In notion I must set up writing like that additionally – taking time and actual effort to produce a very good article… but what / things I say… I procrastinate alot and by no means manage to go completed.

  • Raymundo Schrier
    Posted at 22:40h, 17 June

    This was for a new and credulous ‘generation’ who, I suppose, have never even heard reference made or seen so much as a parody of the series – which is most unlikely, if I might paraphrase our favorite Vulcan.

  • SEO expert
    Posted at 03:38h, 24 June

    That is the proper weblog for anyone who desires to search out out about this topic. You notice so much its almost arduous to argue with you (not that I really would want…HaHa). You undoubtedly put a brand new spin on a topic thats been written about for years. Nice stuff, simply great!

  • Bret Walquist
    Posted at 04:57h, 28 June

    Great blog here! Also your site so much up very fast! What web host are you using? Can I am getting your associate link on your host? I wish my website loaded up as quickly as yours lol

  • Lavonne Stettner
    Posted at 01:01h, 01 July

    There is noticeably a lot of money to comprehend this. I assume you made particular nice points in features also.

  • Keiko Shirer
    Posted at 21:15h, 01 July

    Fantastic blog you have here but I was wondering if you knew of any forums that cover the same topics discussed here? I’d really like to be a part of group where I can get advice from other knowledgeable individuals that share the same interest. If you have any recommendations, please let me know. Thanks!

  • Conrad Ribot
    Posted at 09:40h, 06 July

    very good submit, i actually love this website, keep on it

  • Katherina Shostak
    Posted at 21:09h, 08 July

    Good post! I have a random question for you. How do you get your blog indexed by bing? I have a related web blog.

  • Emory Culver
    Posted at 02:03h, 10 July

    Hi there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after checking through some of the post I realized it’s new to me. Nonetheless, I’m definitely delighted I found it and I’ll be book-marking and checking back frequently!

  • quest bars cheap
    Posted at 23:01h, 10 July

    It’s very straightforward to find out any topic on net as compared
    to textbooks, as I found this article at this web page.

  • my explanation
    Posted at 23:13h, 10 July

    Greetings there, just became aware about your writings through The Big G, and found that it is genuinely helpful. I will like if you continue this idea.

  • quest bars
    Posted at 00:07h, 11 July

    Appreciate the recommendation. Let me try it out.

  • Faytech North America
    Posted at 11:51h, 12 July

    Faytech North America is a touch screen Manufacturer of both monitors and pcs. They specialize in the design, development, manufacturing and marketing of Capacitive touch screen, Resistive touch screen, Industrial touch screen, IP65 touch screen, touchscreen monitors and integrated touchscreen PCs. Contact them at, 121 Varick Street, New York, NY 10013, +1 646 205 3214

  • check my reference
    Posted at 14:36h, 12 July

    Might be near close to impossible to encounter well-informed men or women on this content, fortunately you come across as like you be aware of the things that you’re preaching about! Appreciate It

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 12:57h, 16 July

    It’s amazing to pay a quick visit this site and reading the views of all friends concerning this piece of writing, while I am also zealous of getting familiarity.

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 20:25h, 17 July

    I am sure this piece of writing has touched all the internet
    people, its really really pleasant post on building up new webpage.

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 01:08h, 18 July

    What i don’t understood is in fact how you’re no longer really much more neatly-appreciated than you might be right now.
    You are very intelligent. You know thus considerably on the subject of this topic, made me for
    my part consider it from numerous numerous angles.
    Its like women and men are not involved unless it is one thing to accomplish with Girl gaga!
    Your individual stuffs excellent. Always deal with it up!

  • plenty of fish dating site
    Posted at 20:04h, 18 July

    Good day! I know this is somewhat off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this site?
    I’m getting tired of WordPress because I’ve had issues with hackers and I’m looking at options for another platform.

    I would be awesome if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

  • plenty of fish dating site
    Posted at 21:55h, 18 July

    I’ve been surfing online more than 3 hours lately, but I
    by no means found any attention-grabbing article like yours.
    It is lovely value enough for me. In my opinion, if all
    site owners and bloggers made good content material as you did,
    the internet might be a lot more helpful than ever before.

  • plenty of fish dating site
    Posted at 15:40h, 19 July

    Thank you, I’ve just been searching for info approximately this topic
    for a while and yours is the best I’ve discovered till now.

    But, what concerning the bottom line? Are you positive concerning the supply?

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 10:22h, 20 July

    Hello, Neat post. There’s an issue with your web
    site in web explorer, would test this? IE still is the market leader and a big part of other people
    will leave out your magnificent writing because of this problem.

  • how to get help in windows 10
    Posted at 00:43h, 22 July

    Yes! Finally someone writes about how to get help in windows 10.

Post A Comment